Check Check Check……

OK People let’s talk about the word CHECK, it’s definition and what it really means when people use it in a automotive setting.

From Websters: a : a standard for testing and evaluation : criterion
From Moppys: 1: a visual peek or quick action

The word check in the automotive world stems from the day of the full service, service station. “Gas ‘er up and check the oil, please” I suppose unless you live in very rural America or Oregon, no one pumps your gas anymore, much less checks your oil. Back then it was the norm to pop the hood and pull the dipstick while the tank was filling. If your car was low on oil, they would sell you a quart along with your fill-up.

Fast forward to today world:

I know the economy has been pretty bad. I know people are out of work, especially in my area. I know some people are cheap fucking bastards. The bastards are the topic of this thing you are reading here.

Some things are within the limits of “check”
Can you rotate my tires and check the brakes? Sure.
Can you check the pressure in my tires for me? Sure.
Will you check my headlights to see if they are functional? Sure.

Some things are gray area:
I think I have a wheel bearing going bad, can you check it? Maybe.
My steering wheel shimmies, can you check it? Maybe.

Will you test drive my car for 15-20 minutes, put it on the rack, take the tire/wheels off taking another 20-30 minutes under the “check” umbrella, And then you take my diagnostics somewhere else to get it fixed? No. HELL-FUCKING-NO.

I understand trying to save money, times are hard. Infact, we do alot of low cost and/or free work for those who just can’t afford it. We do our part for the community. It’s the people with money (or are living outside their means while appearing to have money) that chap my ass. That and their creative use of the word check.

Like this (yes, someone actually said this to me):
“How much to rotate and balance?”
“OK, well, I don’t need them balanced so just rotate and check the balance.”

How in the hell do you check the balance without putting it on the 12,000 dollar balancer? You don’t. I have a solution for the guy above. Last time he tried that, we rotated the tires and I told him the balance “looked” okay since the wheels had weights on them. He was unhappy i didn’t “check” them for free. Sorry folks. I don’t care.

I’ll save “alignment check” for another time.

So, in closing, from this moment forward, “check” has been stricken from my vocabulary. I will inspect, adjust, align, balance, remove, replace, repair…… I will do almost anything except check. Check does not equal free.

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